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September 10, 2012

I’m going to try something new on the blog today. Sort of a free write about where I am with Christ right now. I want people to know that they are not alone and I want this blog to be my personal journal space. So therefore I need to be vulnerable. I’m hoping no one takes my vulnerability and runs with it but instead I’m hoping to inspire you to be open as well. It’s going to be ramble and choppy but it’s a free write from my heart. Please enjoy.

As I write I’ll be listening to My Soul Longs For You by Jesus Culture and Set a Fire by More Than Sunday.

I’m going to be honest. I haven’t been doing my devotions regularly. I’m letting school get in the way. I go out and live life and come back to my room late at night. Do homework. Go to sleep. And repeat. But when I listen to My Soul Longs for You I get this stirred up feeling inside me. All I want is God in my life but I allow Earthly things to get in my way. That’s not cool. “My soul longs for you” is my prayer to God. I need to stop letting life get in the way of my one true desire. It’s the only one that matters. “I believe you will come like the rain” states that we do believe that He is coming and that He is here among us. I believe it so why don’t I live like I believe it?! But every time I listen to “My Should Longs for You” God just tells me, “It’s okay. I still love you.” That love is amazing. If you have never felt His unconditional love I can’t imagine what your life must be like. His love calms me, gives me peace.

Set a Fire just repeats basically the same things over and over. “There’s no place I would rather be than here in your love.” That’s so true. Yes, I love spending time with other people watching movies or hanging out but when I’m in the presence of God…well there’s absolutely nothing better. “Set a fire to my soul that I can’t contain and I can’t control.” That burning passion that God gives us gets me so excited. If it was socially acceptable I would be going from table to table right this second shouting about God’s love and how freaking amazing it is. But why don’t I do it? Who cares if it’s not socially acceptable. If I want to be on fire God, I should be!! 24/7!

God, just “let it rain” down on us. Let this whole world light on fire for you! Allow every person in this school, in this city, in this county, in this state, in this country, in this world feel your unrelenting love. Help me to live 110% for you. Start a fire in my soul that never burns out and help me spread it like wildfire around my world. Allow me to feel your presence every step on my day. Whether I’m chilling in my dorm, spending time with Seth, or sitting in Astronomy help me to feel you. I just want more of you God.

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